Well, here I am...woke up when it started raining and I can't fall asleep. So I'm checking my email and sending birthday cards. Here's a couple of fun surveys I got recently. You're supposed to check the ones you have have done on this first one.
( ) Smoked a cigarette (w/my asthma, I’d probably die)
( x) Drank so much you threw up
( ) Stolen a car
( x ) Been in love
( ) Been dumped (only been the dumpee)
( x ) Been laid off/fired (does the job I had when I was 16 count? And I almost got laid off -left before the actuality)
( x ) Quit your job
( ) Been in a fist fight
( ) Sneaked out of your parent's house
( x ) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back (does the time from when I was 7-15 count?)
( ) Gone on a blind date
( x )Lied to a friend (not recently, but I’m sure in middle school when girls were all out to get each other)
( ) Skipped an entire semester
( x ) Seen someone die
( x ) Been to Canada (for lunch)
( ) Been to Mexico
( x ) Been on a plane
( x ) Been lost
( ) Been on the opposite side of the country (San Francisco & Carmel)
( x ) Gone to Washington , DC
( x ) Swam in the ocean (both oceans-if you count feet in)
( x ) Felt like dying (when I had a bacterial infection & see 2nd item above)
( x ) Cried yourself to sleep
( x ) Played cops and robbers
( ) Recently colored with crayons
( x ) Sang karaoke (in a group) – good times!
( ) Paid for a meal with only coins
( x ) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't -
( x ) Made prank phone calls -
( x ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( x) Caught a snow flake on your tongue
( x ) Made a snow angel
( ) Danced in the rain
( x ) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about
( ) Blown Bubbles
( x ) Made a bonfire on the beach/campground (does Girl Scout camp count?)
( ) Crashed a party
( x ) Gone roller skating
( x ) Gone ice skating
----------------------------------------------
What are you afraid of? Drowning
Most recent movie you have seen in the theater? 3:10 to Yuma
Ever seen a ghost? No, but I know I heard one
Where were you born? Iowa Falls, IA
Ever Been to Alaska ? Nope
Ever been toiletpapering? Yes
Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yes
Been in a serious car accident? Not a serious one
Do you plan to have any more Children? Yes
Favorite day of the week? Saturday and Sunday (yeah weekends!)
Favorite Restaurant? Luna Maya & Ichiban in Minneapolis
Favorite Ice Cream? Cookie Dough from Cold Stone Creamery
Favorite Shake flavor at a fast food restaurant? Wendy’s frosty
Favorite food at a fast food restaurant? Brad and I once drove through all of these places to have the ideal meal: BK hamburger, McDonald’s fries, and Wendy’s frosty
What color is your bedroom carpet? brown
What is your favorite alcoholic drink? Anything except whiskey– Anything Lisa or Shari make
Favorite non-alcoholic drink? Vitamin Water..although I'm not really picky here, either...just not Coke or Diet Coke
Tattoos? None
Body piercing? Ears x 2
What is your favorite vacation spot? If I'm on vacation, it's my favorite....I really love being able to hear the ocean, though.
Ever steal any traffic signs? Nope, discussed it, though
Favorite Salad Dressing ? Ranch
Favorite number? 28
Favorite Holiday? Christmas
What do you do to relax? Hang out with Brad and Sammy w/ a glass of wine
What is your favorite food? Mexican and JapaneseFavorite sound? The ocean, Sammy running to meet me, Bradley and so many more
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Still happily married w/children and dogs, working at Target in one of the 4 places I wouldn’t object moving to.
Farthest place you will send this? Arizona
How many times did you fail your driver's test? 0- I don’t do failure
From whom did you get your last e-mail? Jessica
What do you do when you are bored? What the heck does bored mean? I haven’t been bored since I was 15
Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest? ? Tiff
Who is the least likely to respond? All the boys who read this
Who is the person that you are most curious to see their answers? I want to see if anyone puts this on their blog or if they email it out.
Favorite TV show? Please! I have a TiVo full –Law & Order, The Office, Intervention and so many more....new addition: Big Shots
Ford or Chevy? BMW What are you listening to right now? The hum of my computer
How many pets do you have? 1
The chicken or the egg? The egg
What would you like to accomplish before you die? Have some kids
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Whew
I can't believe it's been a week since my last post. It turns out working 5 days makes time go by even faster than working 4. I guess I had forgotten that. Anyhoo...lots going on..last week was SUPER BUSY trying to get settled into my new job and this week has just been CRAZY busy...what's the difference? I'm not really sure, I think it's just a difference I talk myself into to make myself think that this week is less chaotic than last week! I can see how I have to have a routine and stay on top of things, so that when something comes up, I do not get buried. There are lots of projects going on right now and the next couple of weeks is to be our busiest time of the year, so toward Thanksgiving, it will be calm down a bit. Until then, full speed ahead it is.
I get to carpool most days, as long as I don't stay too late...That's a good thing, then Ryan and I have to kick each other out of the building and not stay too late. After all that stuff at work, time to trying and help manage a household, too. I feel like a juggler -- and I don't even have any kids yet -- Luckily having Sammy is a lot like having one!
Tonight Bradley is with Sammy at dog training, so I'm catching up on my home email and things. During my 1st full weekend on days, I went to the wine festival on Saturday which was great and then we went to Luna Maya to eat with some friends - I'll post pictures later from the festival. Sunday, Bradley and I hung out and watched football and I caught up on a few errands and things. Bradley wasn't feeling well and Monday woke up with the full fledged flu (yuck).
Anyway, just wanted to check in and let you all know what we're doing this week and that we haven't fallen off the Earth!
Get well wishes to Grandma Y who had knee replacement today!
This weekend should be more relaxation and fun fall activities, so we'll see what we end up doing--it's nice to have Sat and Sun off to relax.
I get to carpool most days, as long as I don't stay too late...That's a good thing, then Ryan and I have to kick each other out of the building and not stay too late. After all that stuff at work, time to trying and help manage a household, too. I feel like a juggler -- and I don't even have any kids yet -- Luckily having Sammy is a lot like having one!
Tonight Bradley is with Sammy at dog training, so I'm catching up on my home email and things. During my 1st full weekend on days, I went to the wine festival on Saturday which was great and then we went to Luna Maya to eat with some friends - I'll post pictures later from the festival. Sunday, Bradley and I hung out and watched football and I caught up on a few errands and things. Bradley wasn't feeling well and Monday woke up with the full fledged flu (yuck).
Anyway, just wanted to check in and let you all know what we're doing this week and that we haven't fallen off the Earth!
Get well wishes to Grandma Y who had knee replacement today!
This weekend should be more relaxation and fun fall activities, so we'll see what we end up doing--it's nice to have Sat and Sun off to relax.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
An update
I forgot to update that my dad went back to work on the 4th. When I talked to him at the end of last week, he was doing pretty well. Not having a lot of pain driving, but definitely feeling that he'd been off work. It's so hard to believe that he's back on his feet already -- boy how time flies! Not so much for dad I suppose, after all those days he was laid up! Over the last month, every time I call him, he was either on an exercise machine or walking all over town...I'm really proud of how much he was pushing himself to get going physically so his return wouldn't be quite so hard....I have been terrible about my gym motivation....well, I'm motivated, my actual execution of getting myself there has been terrible....It's my #2 commitment now that I'm on days..if he can get going on that sore leg, I can get 20-30 minutes in at the gym...my #1 commitment is getting this sleep thing back on track. I would guess that if I can't stay awake after work, I can't really work out. :-)
1 year ago
It was 1 year ago today that I got the call. I was home (my day off) and my grandpa was recovering from bypass surgery. Brad called for what I thought would be his normal lunchtime call when he said he had some bad news...It all happened so fast...in a matter of seconds, but it feels like it took minutes to go through each thought in my head. I started shaking...I thought something had happened to my grandpa and waited for him to tell me. I thought it was weird that he was calling me with any news, versus a sister or my parents, but thought maybe someone thought it would be better coming from him.
Then he said his mom was walking Abby and was hit by a car. My panic lifted a little, but I was still concerned, because his family talks to us about medical situations when they are quite serious. I thought, ok, she must have broken her leg or something and is in the hospital. Then he said it. And she died. What?! He said it again. I felt like I was dreaming. This couldn't be happening. How could she have been hit so badly in Grundy Center, that she would die? It didn't seem possible...did they have the wrong person?
He was so upset...he said he could get it together to drive home, that others had offered to drive him. And for the next several hours, we just cried while our friends came and went and we wondered, who hit her and why did they leave?
It almost unbelievable that it's been a year already, and most of the questions have been answered. Some still aren't, but they are the ones that never will be, so I am at peace with that. I still think about how if you would have asked me ahead of time how I would react in a situation like this and 'eye for an eye' is surely what I would have said. After this happened, I thought of Barb and how that is not how she would want it at all and decided I would be at peace with whatever the outcome. She would not want me to feel horrible forever about it.
I am still always sad about the whole thing, how it happened, how it was way too soon, but try to focus more on how to make sure we always remember. We have a collage of pictures hanging up with her and I am finding more pictures to put on her website as a collection of her. I often think of what she would think or feel about something and as I've said on her blog, I think about how she would handle something. She made her life count to everyone around her and she is my inspiration to making sure mine does too.
Miss you, Barb,
Love, Andi
Then he said his mom was walking Abby and was hit by a car. My panic lifted a little, but I was still concerned, because his family talks to us about medical situations when they are quite serious. I thought, ok, she must have broken her leg or something and is in the hospital. Then he said it. And she died. What?! He said it again. I felt like I was dreaming. This couldn't be happening. How could she have been hit so badly in Grundy Center, that she would die? It didn't seem possible...did they have the wrong person?
He was so upset...he said he could get it together to drive home, that others had offered to drive him. And for the next several hours, we just cried while our friends came and went and we wondered, who hit her and why did they leave?
It almost unbelievable that it's been a year already, and most of the questions have been answered. Some still aren't, but they are the ones that never will be, so I am at peace with that. I still think about how if you would have asked me ahead of time how I would react in a situation like this and 'eye for an eye' is surely what I would have said. After this happened, I thought of Barb and how that is not how she would want it at all and decided I would be at peace with whatever the outcome. She would not want me to feel horrible forever about it.
I am still always sad about the whole thing, how it happened, how it was way too soon, but try to focus more on how to make sure we always remember. We have a collage of pictures hanging up with her and I am finding more pictures to put on her website as a collection of her. I often think of what she would think or feel about something and as I've said on her blog, I think about how she would handle something. She made her life count to everyone around her and she is my inspiration to making sure mine does too.
Miss you, Barb,
Love, Andi
Monday, October 15, 2007
Alphabet quiz from TiffyHan
i think i'm staring to tucker out...maybe doing this quiz i stole from tiffyhan's blog will help
:-)
A - Available: for fun times with family & friends
A - Age: 29 (and 49 weeks)
A - Annoyance: liars
B - Bestest Friend: Bradley
B - Birthday: Nov 6th
B- Band: Nickelback & Metallica (but I have a long list of those I enjoy!)
C - Crush: Bradley :-) ......Tom Cruise, Chad Kroeger (when he plays guitar), Scott Weiland (when he dances), Tommy Lee, and David Beckham.
C - Car: 98 BMW 540i
C - Candy: i love this way too much --- kills my teeth and has too many calories
D - Day or night: early morning when the sun is just coming up....and nights...i like staying up late (not this late on a night before I have to work)
D - Dream Car: in the real world...a BMW...in fantasy world...a McLaren SLR Roadster...only $10,000 per month payments
D - Date: dinner and a movie...i love to eat and i love movies
E- Easiest person to talk to?: Bradley
E- Eggs: scrambled, with cheese
E- Excited for: the wine festival on saturday...a tradition...and to work days!
F - Favorite Month: november
F - Favorite color: green
F - Favorite Memories: wedding & honeymoon, NYC, moving to VA
G - Gummy Bears or Worms: both! see: Candy
G - Giver or taker: both--i know when it's time to do each of them
G - Gum or Mints: mints
H - Hair Color: really brown...but usually "Tom's red" with blonde high lights
H - Height: 5' 5"
H - Happy: Yes :-)
I - Ice Cream: Cookie Dough...especially from Cold Stone Creamery
I - Instrument: played flute and soprano sax in HS
I - Intelligent or Rich: I would like to be both....I'll settle for my current state of semi-intelligent and rich in life
J - Jewelry: wedding ring, my Livestrong bracelet, my promise ring, and a watch
J - Job: anything I don't hate --- my dream job would be to win the lottery and be able to volunteer for the red cross or fema
J - Jail: my dad locked me in once to show me what it was like...and we've been to alcatraz.
K - Kids: none -- yes, I know...I know
K - Kickboxing or Karate: Kickboxing I guess -- never done either, unless you count Tae-bo
K - Kindergarden: scary -- I got glasses...let the teasing begin...and my teacher made me try brocolli after i told her i didn't like it and I gagged
L - Longest Car Ride: IA to VA, VA to IA, and IA to VA
L - Lover or hater: depends on the day
L - Logic or Reason: logic most of the time
M - Milk Flavor: i like regular, chocolate, and strawberry -- all with different things
M - Most missed person: my friends and family...mostly my neice and nephews
M - Movie: Top Gun....but I'll watch about anything
N - Number of Siblings: 2
N - Number of Tattoos: none
N - Name: Andi, Dre, Dellit, Red
O - ONE WiSH: to live a long, healthy, happy life with bradley
O - One Phobia: i have several...drowning is probably the worst
O - One regret: financial decisions...probably would have led to kids earlier & to less stressful bill paying days
P- Pet Peeves: disorganization
P- Part of your appearance you like best? my glasses
P- Part of your personality? crazy
Q- Quote: you treat people how to treat you (dr.phil)
Q- Quick or Slow: really depends what i'm doing
Q - Quitter or Leader: usually a leader..i can quit quickly if it's a really bad idea
R - Reason to smile: i have my health and am happy
R - Reality TV Show: american idol....and intervention
R - Reason to cry: when i feel like i've failed
S - Song Last Heard: something by maroon 5, i'm sure
S - Season: Fall
S - Shoe: LOTS...love them!
T - Time you woke up: for some reason my body decided today was catch up day and i slept right through the morning until brad came home from golf at noon
T - Time Now: 132am ...arg
T - Time for bed: should have been 10 or 11pm
U - U love someone: Lots of someones...ditto
U - Unpredictable?: hardly
U - Underwear: i need to go shopping
V - Vegetable you hate: peas
V - Vacation spot: to Shari's and Tiffany's this fall
V - Vegetarian: not officially, but i could be 85% of the time...i do crave burgers now and then...so i couldn't ever be one entirely.
W- Worst Habits: Procrastinate...ditto! and biting my nails
W- Where are you going to travel next?: PA
W- Weather right now: cool, clear and about 50 degrees...a perfect fall night
X - X-Rays: what the? i've had some taken...the last ones were of my feet to investigate a bone spur.
X- Ex boyfriend: long time ago...i do wonder what happened to him.....
Y - Year you were born: 1977
Y - Year it is now: what kind of stupid question is this? Does this change from day to day?
Y - Yellow: the color of my mums outside
Z - Zoo Animal: i like them all...zoos are great...i do feel badly that the animals are caged up
:-)
A - Available: for fun times with family & friends
A - Age: 29 (and 49 weeks)
A - Annoyance: liars
B - Bestest Friend: Bradley
B - Birthday: Nov 6th
B- Band: Nickelback & Metallica (but I have a long list of those I enjoy!)
C - Crush: Bradley :-) ......Tom Cruise, Chad Kroeger (when he plays guitar), Scott Weiland (when he dances), Tommy Lee, and David Beckham.
C - Car: 98 BMW 540i
C - Candy: i love this way too much --- kills my teeth and has too many calories
D - Day or night: early morning when the sun is just coming up....and nights...i like staying up late (not this late on a night before I have to work)
D - Dream Car: in the real world...a BMW...in fantasy world...a McLaren SLR Roadster...only $10,000 per month payments
D - Date: dinner and a movie...i love to eat and i love movies
E- Easiest person to talk to?: Bradley
E- Eggs: scrambled, with cheese
E- Excited for: the wine festival on saturday...a tradition...and to work days!
F - Favorite Month: november
F - Favorite color: green
F - Favorite Memories: wedding & honeymoon, NYC, moving to VA
G - Gummy Bears or Worms: both! see: Candy
G - Giver or taker: both--i know when it's time to do each of them
G - Gum or Mints: mints
H - Hair Color: really brown...but usually "Tom's red" with blonde high lights
H - Height: 5' 5"
H - Happy: Yes :-)
I - Ice Cream: Cookie Dough...especially from Cold Stone Creamery
I - Instrument: played flute and soprano sax in HS
I - Intelligent or Rich: I would like to be both....I'll settle for my current state of semi-intelligent and rich in life
J - Jewelry: wedding ring, my Livestrong bracelet, my promise ring, and a watch
J - Job: anything I don't hate --- my dream job would be to win the lottery and be able to volunteer for the red cross or fema
J - Jail: my dad locked me in once to show me what it was like...and we've been to alcatraz.
K - Kids: none -- yes, I know...I know
K - Kickboxing or Karate: Kickboxing I guess -- never done either, unless you count Tae-bo
K - Kindergarden: scary -- I got glasses...let the teasing begin...and my teacher made me try brocolli after i told her i didn't like it and I gagged
L - Longest Car Ride: IA to VA, VA to IA, and IA to VA
L - Lover or hater: depends on the day
L - Logic or Reason: logic most of the time
M - Milk Flavor: i like regular, chocolate, and strawberry -- all with different things
M - Most missed person: my friends and family...mostly my neice and nephews
M - Movie: Top Gun....but I'll watch about anything
N - Number of Siblings: 2
N - Number of Tattoos: none
N - Name: Andi, Dre, Dellit, Red
O - ONE WiSH: to live a long, healthy, happy life with bradley
O - One Phobia: i have several...drowning is probably the worst
O - One regret: financial decisions...probably would have led to kids earlier & to less stressful bill paying days
P- Pet Peeves: disorganization
P- Part of your appearance you like best? my glasses
P- Part of your personality? crazy
Q- Quote: you treat people how to treat you (dr.phil)
Q- Quick or Slow: really depends what i'm doing
Q - Quitter or Leader: usually a leader..i can quit quickly if it's a really bad idea
R - Reason to smile: i have my health and am happy
R - Reality TV Show: american idol....and intervention
R - Reason to cry: when i feel like i've failed
S - Song Last Heard: something by maroon 5, i'm sure
S - Season: Fall
S - Shoe: LOTS...love them!
T - Time you woke up: for some reason my body decided today was catch up day and i slept right through the morning until brad came home from golf at noon
T - Time Now: 132am ...arg
T - Time for bed: should have been 10 or 11pm
U - U love someone: Lots of someones...ditto
U - Unpredictable?: hardly
U - Underwear: i need to go shopping
V - Vegetable you hate: peas
V - Vacation spot: to Shari's and Tiffany's this fall
V - Vegetarian: not officially, but i could be 85% of the time...i do crave burgers now and then...so i couldn't ever be one entirely.
W- Worst Habits: Procrastinate...ditto! and biting my nails
W- Where are you going to travel next?: PA
W- Weather right now: cool, clear and about 50 degrees...a perfect fall night
X - X-Rays: what the? i've had some taken...the last ones were of my feet to investigate a bone spur.
X- Ex boyfriend: long time ago...i do wonder what happened to him.....
Y - Year you were born: 1977
Y - Year it is now: what kind of stupid question is this? Does this change from day to day?
Y - Yellow: the color of my mums outside
Z - Zoo Animal: i like them all...zoos are great...i do feel badly that the animals are caged up
decaf
when i got my venti pumpkin spice latte today, i didn't ask for decaf...now i can't go to sleep...and i have to get up at 6am...yikes....since i don't drink a lot of caffeine because of my heart palpitations, any caffeine affects me a lot...i want to have a new routine of driving to farm fresh to get my starbucks coffee splurge and the paper each sunday morning now that i have sundays off...i will definitely remember to ask for decaf next sunday.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Googled
Well, it turns out that if you forget the name of our blog, you can type in "the dellits" on Google and we show up! So do a couple of people's blogs who I've commented on, but you have to scroll down on the page to see those links {"dellits blog" also works as a search}.
:-) Funny -- I was reading some 'blogs of note' that show up when I sign into blogspot and saw a guy do this to his blog and wanted to see if it worked.
As they would say on Mythbusters:
Myth: Confirmed
:-) Funny -- I was reading some 'blogs of note' that show up when I sign into blogspot and saw a guy do this to his blog and wanted to see if it worked.
As they would say on Mythbusters:
Myth: Confirmed
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Funny -- Why men shouldn't take messages
I've seen this before and got it again today, so I thought I'd share :-)
I wonder
I wonder if I'll be as reflective and rambling when I actually get back to sleeping at a regular time and not being awake at 3 am :-) ... This blog is cheaper than therapy and easier to write in than a journal...I find it's cathartic and hope you don't mind
:-)
:-)
Reflection
After the year my family has had, I was reminded this week again how lucky we are. It's been tough...it's been almost a year since Barb died....our friend passed away from cancer, Brad's grandpa lost his battle with cancer, and this week my family lost a dear friend. I was the least close to her, as she was in the dance group that Mom, Dad, Tiff, and Jessica joined after I moved to college. I did know her and her relentless love for life so it makes me very sad that they have lost this love in their life this week.
We all live far apart right now, building our lives into something they never could have been had Tiffany, Brad and I stayed in Iowa, but it seems that over the past year, we have needed each other more than ever. I was reminded this week that we have this connection that allows us to rally for each other.
I don't know how I got this going in my head, but just looking back at my whole life and how our family unit has evolved, I am so grateful for what I have. The original 5 of us (M, D and the 3 girls) went through a lot when we were growing up. Like every marriage, my parents had the greatest of ups and the lowest of lows. We didn't have any money (cops are as poorly underpaid as teachers) and I remember times that we could barely afford my asthma medicine. With my dad working the hours he did, my mom always on a quest to get a job that paid more to provide for us and the 3 of us having to fend for ourselves many nights after school (that was of course back in the day that you could leave your children home alone), I'll admit there were many days that the house was more tense than calm. There was not an overabundance of i love yous or hugs (except at bedtime and when Dad went to work--it's a small town, but you never want to take the chance that he might not come home) but I think we all always knew that we loved each other. I can see now the great love our family has and shows for each other. I think that we always had it, we just have needed it more this year...
Rewind to a time when Tiffany was with someone, who I wouldn't give the privilege of calling a man, who didn't make her happy. The family tried to convince her (that didn't work) tried to support her (even though we very much disagreed) and one day, my dad just couldn't take it anymore and simply, we went and rescued her. I think Brad said it best when he said our family is close and if you marry one of these girls, you marry this whole family. We saw one of our own in trouble and reached a point where the unhappiness just wasn't acceptable.
Fast forward to when Jessica found out she was pregnant more than 2 years ago. We'd all admit that this created a huge tension in the family and for the first time, I felt a very uncomfortable, and great divide amongst us. 99% of it boiled down to miscommunication, and being that 2 of us were 1200 miles away, it made trying to fix this that much harder. It was probably the most uncomfortable I had felt in my family in many, many years. In the end, it all worked out, I think mostly in part to the honesty that we all possess. We are a family who tells each other how we feel, even when we don't want to hear it. It might escalate problems at the time, but in the long run, makes things so much easier to resolve. We got through this part quickly and the focus turned where it should be, on supporting Jessica and Chad.
Fast forward again to the day that Barb died. I remember calling my dad, who was at the hospital with Mom and Grandma because Grandpa had bypass surgery the day before. When I told him what happened, I heard him gasp and felt his heart collapse and when he told my mom, I heard her sob in the background. On that day, our family heart broke. In the days that lay ahead, they all called to support, arranged for transportation to & from the airport, and even though grandpa was in the hospital, took time out to get to Ron and Barb's family to support them before we could get back to Iowa.
When Dad fell and "went boom" this summer. It was hard to be so far away, but immediately plans were underway on how to keep him busy during the summer while he was laid up. Tiffany had a great idea and Jessica and I were able to be there to deliver it. And boy, was Dad ever thankful.
Now that we all have great husbands and families of our own, it amazes me when I see people whose families don't get along and don't rally for each other. It makes me sad to think that they don't have people that would drop everything to be there in a crisis. I'm quite sure that if there was a horrible crisis, I would have several members of my family at my door. No questions, "I'm packing my stuff and I'm coming". Jobs, houses, cars, and other stuff aside, none of it would matter-we would figure it all out later, the important thing would be, get there and get there now.
I mentioned before that our family has evolved...From "just the 5 of us"., we grew to "just the 10 of us". We all married wonderful husbands and Jessica has 2 great kids. I know that the men we chose were not on accident, they are true members of this family and true supporters of all of the rest. I don't think our family would allow it any other way. It's really like I have 2 sisters and 2 brothers (just take out the "in-law" part entirely). Again, some of us live far apart right now and can't physically be together all the time...But what's comforting to know is that something as simple as "just checking to see how you are" is sometimes just enough to stay connected. We all recognize that each branch of our 10 member family tree is on a quest to make our lives better and get as much out of life as we can...and we are all doing it in our own little ways...And even though that has taken us far away from each other, it's ok, because we have learned how to support each other regardless; whether it a trip to attend graduation or a phone call to see how your handling the loss of a dear friend, it all just feels good to know that there are people out there rooting for you, no matter what.
We all live far apart right now, building our lives into something they never could have been had Tiffany, Brad and I stayed in Iowa, but it seems that over the past year, we have needed each other more than ever. I was reminded this week that we have this connection that allows us to rally for each other.
I don't know how I got this going in my head, but just looking back at my whole life and how our family unit has evolved, I am so grateful for what I have. The original 5 of us (M, D and the 3 girls) went through a lot when we were growing up. Like every marriage, my parents had the greatest of ups and the lowest of lows. We didn't have any money (cops are as poorly underpaid as teachers) and I remember times that we could barely afford my asthma medicine. With my dad working the hours he did, my mom always on a quest to get a job that paid more to provide for us and the 3 of us having to fend for ourselves many nights after school (that was of course back in the day that you could leave your children home alone), I'll admit there were many days that the house was more tense than calm. There was not an overabundance of i love yous or hugs (except at bedtime and when Dad went to work--it's a small town, but you never want to take the chance that he might not come home) but I think we all always knew that we loved each other. I can see now the great love our family has and shows for each other. I think that we always had it, we just have needed it more this year...
Rewind to a time when Tiffany was with someone, who I wouldn't give the privilege of calling a man, who didn't make her happy. The family tried to convince her (that didn't work) tried to support her (even though we very much disagreed) and one day, my dad just couldn't take it anymore and simply, we went and rescued her. I think Brad said it best when he said our family is close and if you marry one of these girls, you marry this whole family. We saw one of our own in trouble and reached a point where the unhappiness just wasn't acceptable.
Fast forward to when Jessica found out she was pregnant more than 2 years ago. We'd all admit that this created a huge tension in the family and for the first time, I felt a very uncomfortable, and great divide amongst us. 99% of it boiled down to miscommunication, and being that 2 of us were 1200 miles away, it made trying to fix this that much harder. It was probably the most uncomfortable I had felt in my family in many, many years. In the end, it all worked out, I think mostly in part to the honesty that we all possess. We are a family who tells each other how we feel, even when we don't want to hear it. It might escalate problems at the time, but in the long run, makes things so much easier to resolve. We got through this part quickly and the focus turned where it should be, on supporting Jessica and Chad.
Fast forward again to the day that Barb died. I remember calling my dad, who was at the hospital with Mom and Grandma because Grandpa had bypass surgery the day before. When I told him what happened, I heard him gasp and felt his heart collapse and when he told my mom, I heard her sob in the background. On that day, our family heart broke. In the days that lay ahead, they all called to support, arranged for transportation to & from the airport, and even though grandpa was in the hospital, took time out to get to Ron and Barb's family to support them before we could get back to Iowa.
When Dad fell and "went boom" this summer. It was hard to be so far away, but immediately plans were underway on how to keep him busy during the summer while he was laid up. Tiffany had a great idea and Jessica and I were able to be there to deliver it. And boy, was Dad ever thankful.
Now that we all have great husbands and families of our own, it amazes me when I see people whose families don't get along and don't rally for each other. It makes me sad to think that they don't have people that would drop everything to be there in a crisis. I'm quite sure that if there was a horrible crisis, I would have several members of my family at my door. No questions, "I'm packing my stuff and I'm coming". Jobs, houses, cars, and other stuff aside, none of it would matter-we would figure it all out later, the important thing would be, get there and get there now.
I mentioned before that our family has evolved...From "just the 5 of us"., we grew to "just the 10 of us". We all married wonderful husbands and Jessica has 2 great kids. I know that the men we chose were not on accident, they are true members of this family and true supporters of all of the rest. I don't think our family would allow it any other way. It's really like I have 2 sisters and 2 brothers (just take out the "in-law" part entirely). Again, some of us live far apart right now and can't physically be together all the time...But what's comforting to know is that something as simple as "just checking to see how you are" is sometimes just enough to stay connected. We all recognize that each branch of our 10 member family tree is on a quest to make our lives better and get as much out of life as we can...and we are all doing it in our own little ways...And even though that has taken us far away from each other, it's ok, because we have learned how to support each other regardless; whether it a trip to attend graduation or a phone call to see how your handling the loss of a dear friend, it all just feels good to know that there are people out there rooting for you, no matter what.
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