Grace

On Wednesday, April 21st, we got a call that Brad's Grandpa Taylor (Barb's dad) went to the hospital that day, and they found he had pancreatic cancer that had spread to his liver & lung. Assuming the worst, we planned a trip to Clear Lake for that Saturday.

On Saturday Brad's dad, Brad, and I headed North. We visited Grandpa in the hospital along with a few other relatives. When we arrived, he was more tired than I've seen him, but definitely joking as usual. He was cheery and telling us how he had pain and went to the doctor, who sent him to the hospital. He shared how the doctor came in crying, and told them the bad news: he had cancer and an infection and with no medication he would only have a few weeks - With medication, a few months, maybe a year.

It was then, that I learned what true grace is. He shared that he was okay with what was in front of him, that's he had a great nearly 90 years of life and a wonderful nearly 65 years of marriage. He shared they were going to look forward and that hospice ladies & volunteers would be coming to the house and "how wonderful" that would be. Of course, as we all bawled our faces off, he started telling jokes again and sharing details of what the last few days had been like. He never once shed a tear or looked sad. He simply said "all things come to an end" and said that his wife, Elaine would go ahead and continue to have a great life.

Brad, his dad, and I were able to spend 30 minutes or so alone with him, tell him we loved him and gave big hugs. He told us as we left "how wonderful" it had been that the past few days brought the family together and that everyone had been gathering at the dinner table after visiting him. We left him, as he wanted to rest and headed back to visit the rest of the family. I knew in my gut he may only have a few weeks left on this earth.

On Wednesday the 27th, the call came that he wasn't doing well and wasn't going to be able to go home. They had moved him to hospice. I was watching Toni's kids so was not able to go, but Brad, Ron and Marilyn's family head to CL to visit him in hospice. While the visit was very sad, Brad felt closure that he got to tell him goodbye.

And then on Friday the 29th, 8 days after he found out he had cancer, Grandpa Taylor passed away. His funeral was this week on Tuesday and it was a horribly sad event with a lot of laughter through tears.

He was the most happy, hard working, positive, cheerful, joking, welcoming, regret-less, and inclusive person I have ever met. I felt like his death was hitting me harder than I expected, given he was Brad's Grandpa. Then I realized, I have known him and visited with him for more than 1/2 of my life. He was one of the first people to welcome me to Brad's family before we were even married. He was actually one of the first people I met from Brad's family - I remember visiting their house so many times - Even his family holding a wedding shower for me at Gma & Gpa Taylor's home. I often think about what this time would have been like for Barb. She was incredibly close to her dad and this would have been so devastating to her, especially how quickly it happened.

Over the past 2 weeks, Howard Taylor taught me what true grace and bravery are. And he made me remember why I live my life with no regrets.